Sometimes in an attempt to seduce a literary agent, writers spend so much time mulling over their first chapter that they forget about the rest of the book. If you’ve ever heard the saying “your first chapter sells your book,” it’s true. Literary agents and readers won’t stick with a book unless the author tells an exceptional story—which means you must write and polish an amazing batch of first pages.

It also means that you need to satisfy those expectations throughout the entire book.  

Writing a book is tough! However, if you can learn how to write a notable first chapter, you can learn how to become a great writer. Period. 

The qualifications for a captivating first chapter carry over into every unit of the story. So let’s learn what grips a reader and keeps them reading. 

In this article, I’ll teach you seven key questions from author and literary agent Paula Munier’s insightful book on writing the beginning of your book, The Writer’s Guide to Beginnings. 

Additionally, I’ll provide an example of a strong first chapter and how it answers these questions. The book I’m going to use today is Take It Back by Kia Abdullah. 

Write a Great First Chapter, Then Write a Great Book

As a developmental editor, I’m always on the hunt for stories that grab my attention from the first pages of a book and keep my attention until the end. I even create bonus episodes on my podcast (Lit Match) to analyze said notable first chapters. 

One of the recent books I read, loved, and featured was Kia Abdullah’s Take It Back. Kia is a remarkable storyteller and kept me engaged (and guessing!) from page one. Her dark and complex story immediately grabbed my attention and is an exceptional example of storytelling from page one to the end.  

Let’s look at how Take It Back answers and measures up to the seven key questions Paula Munier urges writers to consider when writing and editing their first chapters. 

A kind warning: this book contains explicit language and sensitive material regarding sex, violence, and rape. 

7 Key Questions to Analyze a First Chapter (and How Take It Back Answers Them)

While plot and structure and character are vital ingredients in every first chapter, they’re not the only elements a writer needs to master.

When I look at a first chapter, I like to pull from the best resource I’ve found on writing beginnings: The Writer’s Guide to Beginnings by author and literary agent Paula Munier. This book is chock full of actionable and direct advice on writing the beginning of your book—and it’s also filled with examples. I recommend it to any writer struggling to write the beginning of their book, or really any of it.

These questions are:

1. What kind of story is it?
2. What is the story really about?
3. Who is telling the story?
4. Which character should they care about most?
5. Where and when does the story take place?
6. How should they feel about what’s happening?
7. Why should they care what happens next?

If you’re familiar with Paula’s book, you probably understand these questions. If you’re not familiar, don’t worry, I’m going to explain each briefly before analyzing how Take It Back’s first chapter answers each question. 

GENRE: WHAT KIND OF STORY IS THIS?

Writers need to know the genre they’re writing—and the beginnings of their manuscript should read like that genre. Paula even indicates that the first words should “reinforce the genre identity set by the title, or you’ll lose the reader—and the sale.”

When a title indicates one genre and the pages counter this expectation, you’ll throw the reader off. This could lead to a loss in an agent’s request for more pages, a sale, and a reader. 

Of course, I’m sure there are the rare outliers who break the rules—but the reality of the publishing business is that if a story doesn’t fit neatly into a known category, the agent and author will have difficulty selling it. The publisher won’t know how to market it. And booksellers won’t know where to shelve it in their store.

Why? Because a story’s target readers are linked to genre, and if the genre isn’t clear, then how do those trying to sell and market the book know who to market it to?

Note: This is where comparable titles can play a huge role in confirming your genre. If you’re having trouble categorizing the genre of your story, I recommend you visit a bookstore. Look for comparable titles to your story and read the first pages. What does the genre read like? Do you give the same impression in your first pages?

If not, don’t panic. Do take some time to edit them.  

Take It Back is a legal thriller, and readers understand this from the first pages, which are riddled with psychological tension about a lawyer who distances herself from a romantic partner, is undergoing a midlife crisis, and who calls herself a cliche. The story is also full of dark suspense, and the first chapter ends with a traumatic confession of a victim who was raped. 

The central protagonist (the lawyer) of the story, Zara, believes this victim (named Jodie Wolfe) and agrees to defend her despite how difficult she knows this case will be.  

PLOT: WHAT IS THE STORY REALLY ABOUT?

Paula shares that she can’t sell a story if she can’t pitch it in fifty words or less.  

This means that from the very beginning, the story needs to clearly define the protagonist, their story goal, and the conflicts they’re up against. Your story needs to indicate the big hook that makes this story worth a reader’s time. 

Here’s my go at Take It Back in thirty-nine words: 

Take It Back is a legal thriller that collides sex, race, and social justice, about a once high-profile lawyer who defends a teenager with facial deformities after she claims that four boys with proven alibis and from hard-working immigrant families raped her.    

Want to take plot and structure specifically for your first chapter a little further? To assess how the structure of a scene holds up in a story, I like to use the five commandments from Story Grid. You can read more about how I use the Story Grid scene analysis template in more articles on DIY MFA, or listen to how Take It Back’s main scene in the first chapter uses the five commandments on my podcast. 

POV: WHO IS TELLING THE STORY? 

If you want to write a book that hooks a literary agent and reader with the first chapter in a book, you need to have a clearly established POV (point of view) character. The POV character is often the protagonist, and readers need to know right away who is telling the story and the limitations of that point of view choice. 

There are three main types of POV: first person, third person limited, third person omniscient. There are other options like second person, too, but these are less common. 

Writers with a strong, established voice often choose first person. Regardless of what POV you choose, a strong voice is necessary for great books, and it’s not uncommon for an agent or editor to pass on a story that lacks a defining voice, or embrace one that is exceptional. 

Books may also include multiple POVs, and in these cases the POV will shift either in scenes or chapters. Writers should avoid head-hopping within a scene unless they’re writing omnisciently (and really, this is a narrator outside the characters, so it’s not exactly head-hopping). 

Regardless of an author’s choice, they should make the POV clear in the first chapter. This will set up expectations for the voice and POV for the rest of the book.

Take It Back is written in third person omniscient, even though it stays close to Zara, Jodie, and Amir for a large portion of the book.

From the first pages, readers can see that the narrator has an opinion and defined voice as they reveal the interaction between Zara and Luka. For instance lines like, “She’d probably break his heart, but what did he expect screwing a Muslim girl?” don’t sound exactly like Zara. 

Additionally, even though the story sticks close to Zara and her feelings and observations, there are subtle shifts like, “he blinked and tried to pinpoint the exact moment he lost her” that shift POV, taking an omniscient viewpoint.

Third person omniscient is a smart choice for this novel since it allows Kia Abdullah, the author, to develop an authorial voice. At the same time, it allows Kia to move between multiple major characters without giving too much away. 

Throughout the book, this choice allows Kia to explore different parts of the trial that might not be apparent to every character—which keeps the reader guessing: Who is telling the truth—Jodie or the boys? 

The reader won’t learn this answer until the last pages of the book.        

CHARACTER: WHICH CHARACTER SHOULD WE CARE ABOUT THE MOST?

Plot is indispensable. Setting is important. But no story works without a memorable, sympathetic character—and all timeless stories will have a character that readers care deeply about. The reason readers keep reading a story is because they want to see if the protagonist makes it—and because of this, they follow the protagonist until the end. 

A chapter that hooks a reader, agent, and editor will make it clear why they should care about the protagonist from the first chapter. They should see how the protagonist is:

1. Sympathetic
2. Placed in a situation that demands a reader’s attention, and
3. Forced to make tough decisions that come with stakes (see the five commandments for more on the crisis question) 

Take It Back opens with an intimate scene between Zara and Luka, establishing Zara as the central protagonist. 

The reader is concerned for her. Zara is ruthlessly hard on herself, calling herself a “f—g cliche” who has lost her dreams of changing the world and becoming extraordinary.

The first chapter then takes us deeper into Zara’s story: She abruptly gave up her high profile career as a lawyer to practice law at a sexual assault center. Her friend even indicates that Zara is having a midlife crisis.

Finally, when Zara meets Jodie Wolfe, she believes Jodie and agrees to defend her—a difficult and dangerous choice that comes with great risks but also the hope of gaining justice for Jodie.

SETTING: WHERE AND WHEN DOES THE STORY TAKE PLACE?

Paula encourages writers to think of their first pages as the establishing shot in a film. Readers are far more likely to enjoy and understand a story—and therefore care about it—if they understand the story’s setting, the time, and the place from the beginning. 

A setting also establishes tone, which is important for your story’s genre. 

When a writer chooses a setting and grounds a reader in the setting, they should consider what makes a setting unique. Settings should do more than establish a place “just because,” they should play a role in shaping your story and plot. This way, whether or not a reader has experienced a setting, readers will see and care about why the setting impacts the plot and characters. 

Take It Back is set in East London. The first chapters also depict Zara’s place of employment, Artemis House on Whitechapel Road. The building is described as “cramped but comfortable,” and the “trust-fund kids in the modern block round the corner were long scared off by the social housing quota.” 

East London is further described as multicultural and insular—a description that naturally raises the stakes for characters like Zara, a Muslim lawyer, Jodie Wolfe, a teenager with facial deformities, and the four Muslim boys Jodie accuses of rape. 

Each of these characters and their greater communities will face a particularly difficult rape case as the case provokes some ugly and dangerous truths about people and society.   

CORE EMOTION: HOW SHOULD THEY FEEL ABOUT WHAT’S HAPPENING?

At the heart of stories, there is emotion—readers want to feel something when they read. They want to experience a cathartic ending and enjoy the range of emotions that a story makes them feel while reading it. 

Paula says that “the sooner you can evoke emotion in your readers, the sooner you draw them into your story.” 

The first pages of a book need to make the reader feel something: a driving emotion that will carry over and build throughout the book. What is the emotion the writer wants to evoke in a book, and how does the story and its first pages successfully do this? 

As a reader of Take It Back, I’m intrigued about Zara and her personal life: her belief that she’s a cliche and her loss of hope, her midlife crisis, her distancing herself from people, and her abrupt decision to change jobs.  

Then throw in Jodie and the boys involved in the rape case. On its own, rape is a heavy topic and horrific. It also has this he said/she said quality to it. Plus, there’s the added factor of Jodie’s physical deformity and that the boys are Muslim. Because of this, I worry that there will be growing issues tied to race and physical differences.

For instance, jurors might not believe Jodie because of her facial deformities and the fact that the people closest to her don’t believe her. Additionally, because the boys are Muslim, there’s potential for Islamaphobia to grow, and the case could endanger the lives and well-being of the boys individually. Finally, there’s the added factor that the Muslim community will reject Zara, if they feel like she’s betraying her own race and culture.  

As a reader, I’m worried for all the characters involved—and, like Zara, I also want justice for the wronged party. But who is that? 

Who is lying, and who is telling the truth? 

STAKES: WHY SHOULD THEY CARE WHAT HAPPENS NEXT? 

Paula mentions how this question deals with three factors: (1) the action happening in the story’s opening, (2) the premise of the story, and (3) the big idea of the story itself. 

Sometimes all three factors are the same thing, sometimes they are different things. Here’s what each entails:

1. The action happens as the story opens. The first pages and first chapter shouldn’t be filled with backstory or obsessive telling. Something interesting needs to happen (an inciting incident and turning point)—and that something should force the character to make a tough decision (a crisis question). There needs to be narrative thrust that makes a reader want to keep reading, meaning that some sort of action needs to happen that advances the plot. 
2. The premise of the story. The premise is the starting point of the story, and it grounds the big ideas for what’s to come. The premise also highlights what’s compelling and where the story will go. 
3. The big idea of the story. This is a story’s hook and what grabs an agent and sells a story, both to agents and to readers. The bigger the idea, the better your chance at selling your story, and the more likely you’ll be able to withstand the length of a novel. 

If you want readers to care about what happens next, look at your story opening. Is something happening in the first scene and chapter that forces a protagonist to make a crisis decision? How does this action and decision relate to the premise of the story and the big idea that makes your story stand out? 

Take It Back opens with tension between Zara and Luka, but the biggest action and decision that happens in the first chapter is when Jodie comes to Zara’s office. 

The stakes are high professionally, psychologically, and, if Zara takes Jodie’s case to court, there’s the potential for physical stakes. And all of these stakes grow with the prosecution and evidence, especially as we start to question who is telling the truth and who is lying. 

In the first chapter, Zara chooses to believe Jodie. That’s her decision, which is an action tied to the premise. It also clasps to the big idea, which is different from other court cases on the market because of the complications reguarding sex, disabilities, and race.

Master a First Chapter, Master a Book 

Whether you’re writing a legal thriller like Take It Back or another genre, the first chapter will make or break a book. They impact an agent’s decision to request more of a manuscript, and they are grounding blocks in a story’s potential and an author’s storytelling skills and writing talent.  

But writers shouldn’t stop with their first chapter. Once a first chapter establishes expectations for a story and the quality of writing and storytelling, they should carry these until the last page of their book. 

When a writer learns how to write a great first chapter, they learn how to become a better storyteller. Using writing tools and methodologies like Paula Munier’s first chapter questions and the five commandments I use to edit a scene’s structure are great ways to assess how your first chapter measures up—and if it stands a chance at hooking your reader.  

Personally, I loved Take It Back and think that Kia Abdullah is a remarkable storyteller and writer. If you write or enjoy legal thrillers or great examples of talented writing, follow her and read her book.  

And if you enjoyed this article and would like to learn more about how I use these questions to analyze first chapters, check out my podcast, Lit Match.

Happy writing!first chapter

Tell us in the comments: How does your first chapter measure up?

Abigail K. Perry is the host of the podcast Lit Match and a certified developmental editor who specializes in Upmarket/Commercial fiction, Women’s Fiction, Historical Fiction, MG/YA fiction, and YA fantasy. Abigail holds a B.S. in TV, Radio, and Film from Syracuse University and a Masters in Secondary Education from Endicott College. Abigail worked as an editorial intern and the Agency Relations Assistant for P.S. Literary Agency, is fluent in book and movie quotes, and loves a long walk with good company, which includes audiobooks and two- and four-legged loved ones and buddies.  You can reach her on her podcast or follow her on Twitter or Instagram

The post How to Start a Book: Seven Questions to Ask about Your First Chapter appeared first on DIY MFA.

Have you signed up to be a DIY MFA Radio Insider yet? This is an exciting new monthly newsletter, especially for our podcast listeners. Every month, you’ll get an email from our podcast producer with recaps of the most recent episodes, a curated Listening List of episodes on a particular theme, and other fun goodies we only share via email. Best of all, it’s free to join! The theme for February is Romance, and you can become an insider by signing up with your email at diymfa.com/insiders.

In this episode JK Ellem and I discuss:

• How a wrong turn and a gated community inspired his Ravenwood series.
• Why he chose to break the rules of POV and how he pulled it off.
• Creating questions that get the reader involved in the mystery and control the pacing.

Plus, his #1 tip for writers.

About JK Ellem

JK Ellem is an Amazon Charts US and UK #1 Bestselling thriller author. 

In 2020, his independently published crime thriller, Mill Point Road, climbed to #1 globally in the Amazon Kindle Store in the categories of Crime Fiction, Thriller Fiction, Financial Thrillers, Heist Crime, Kidnapping Crime Fiction, and Noir. This was achieved with no agent, no publicist, and no publishing company behind him. Just him and his wife Jennifer, who looks after his marketing and social media.

Jack was born in London and sold his business in 2017 so he could concentrate on writing full-time. He has a dry sense of humor that tends to get him into trouble with his wife and their three adult children.  

Jack splits his time between the US, the UK, and Australia.

You can find them on his website or follow him on Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, or LinkedIn.

Mill Point Road

Five women. Five dark and sinister secrets. One killer who knows them all.

When Rebecca Cartwright, young and recently widowed, moves into the exclusive gated community of Mill Point Road, in the town of Ravenwood, she thought she had found her sanctuary. Leaving behind the bad memories of her past, she soon befriends the welcoming group of wives who are her neighbors.

But behind the backdrop of beautiful homes, manicured lawns, and high walls, Becca soon discovers that the women of Mill Point Road are hiding dark and sinister secrets. There is Zoe Collins, young and timid who tells everyone she’s so in love with her husband as she tries to cover up the bruises on her arms. Sabine Miller, the queen of information, together with her husband Mark, they are the living, breathing statement of wealth and success. Maggie Vickerman, the older patriarch of the group, keeps her numerous liaisons with younger men hidden from her husband, Hank. And then there is Paige Hamill, the only child of a US Senator who desperately wants a child and will do anything to fall pregnant.

But no one knows Becca has her own secret, and it’s the darkest and most sinister of them all…

Ravenwood (Book 2: Ravenwood Series)

In some small towns, you can get away with murder.

Catching the Eden Killer earned Haley Perez her detective’s badge—and plenty of angst from her fellow, more experienced, detectives. With her mentor, Marvin Richards, now retired, Perez must rely on her own instincts when the body of a woman is found frozen to death in the forest near Ravenwood, with her eyes gouged out.

But, that’s the least of Haley’s problems; she has a deadly, new admirer.  Someone claiming to be the Eden Killer’s mentor, is stalking her.

Then there are the women of Mill Point Road; Becca, Paige, Maggie and Sabine, as well as a new, mysterious neighbor who has recently moved in. Old secrets will be revealed, new secrets will emerge, and staying friends may prove to be lethal.

With the help of Annabel Chandler, a county forensic investigator, Haley Perez follows the trail of this new, cruel, and sadistic killer who is roaming the snow-covered streets in search of their next victim.

Winter isn’t the only brutally chilling thing to arrive in Ravenwood.

Ravenwood is the electrifying sequel to Mill Point Road, the Amazon US & UK #1 Bestselling Thriller, from JK Ellem.

If you decide to check out these books, we hope you’ll do so via these Amazon affiliate links for Mill Point Road and Ravenwood, where if you choose to purchase via the link DIY MFA gets a referral fee at no cost to you. As always, thank you for supporting DIY MFA!

Link to Episode 398

(Right-click to download.)

If you liked this episode…

Head over to iTunes, Stitcher Radio, Spotify, or Google and subscribe so you’ll be first to know when new episodes are available.

Also, remember that sharing is caring so if you know anyone who might enjoy this podcast, please tell them about it or leave us a review so other listeners will want to check it out.

Until next week, keep writing and keep being awesome!

The post Episode 398: Trust Your Reader and Trust Yourself: Writing a Multiple Point of View Thriller – Interview with JK Ellem appeared first on DIY MFA.

Stepping into somebody else’s shoes is hard, but inhabiting a character’s brain is even harder. Your job is no longer just to tell a story, but to tell it as only your protagonist would. And there are lots of traps you can fall into along the way.

Violating Perspective

This first problem is not one that’s exclusive to writing in the first person—it comes up when working in close third too. (Close third person = using names and pronouns for all characters while still “seeing” the world of the story from one character’s point of view.)

The issue here is undermining the perspective you’re ostensibly writing in by including information that your main character couldn’t possibly know. In third person fiction this could be by including a scene your viewpoint character is not present for, but in first person the violation is often subtler. Perhaps your character has never been to this planet before, but she’s speaking about the climate and vegetation as if she was an expert. Or your character is telling us exactly what his love interest is thinking, although he doesn’t have telepathic powers.

The rule is clear: if your first person character doesn’t know something, it can’t be part of their narrative. Once you’ve chosen your lens on this world, you can’t just jump outside of it.

Noticing the “Wrong” Details

Linked to this is an even subtler erosion of point of view through having your first person character noticing and remarking upon the wrong details at the wrong time.

If your character is a seamstress, she may well dwell on the fabrics and cuts of every dress at a ball, but if she’s an assassin on a mission to kill someone at the party, her focus may be elsewhere. Ask yourself what is unique about how your character experiences the world. Are they a perfumier who’s particularly attuned to smells? Is he the only child at a gathering of adults, observing the action from a different height? Lean into these perspectives and show us what it feels like to be someone else, as only fiction can.

The “wrong time” part of this equation is important too. If someone is in the midst of a fight scene, they probably aren’t thinking about the exact shade of a sunset. If someone’s just been kidnapped and is afraid for their life, is this a realistic moment to include a character-building flashback about their childhood?

(Over-)Using the Mirror Trick

Most often your viewpoint character will also be your main character, and you probably want us to know what they look like, right? But this can be tricky in first person fiction. In real life, people often think about their appearance when they catch sight of their reflection, but unfortunately having your protagonist detail their looks while looking in a mirror is a cliché that usually feels unnatural and inserted for reader benefit.

Does this mean your viewpoint character can never look in a mirror? No. But consider ways to drop in small details about their appearance over time, rather than telling us everything we need to know in a lengthy descriptive mirror scene.

Starting Too Many Sentences with “I”

Using “I” is what writing in the first person is about, but this doesn’t mean that every sentence needs to start in this way. Once the point of view has been established for readers, you can mix up your sentence structures for variety and interest.

One way to do this and to check you’re not getting stuck in a sentence rut is to listen to your writing using text to voice applications. Learn to appreciate the rhythm of prose and play with new ways to start your sentences.

Relying on Eavesdropping

Finally, try to ensure the mechanics of your plot don’t involve too much eavesdropping! How often is your first person character overhearing conversations they shouldn’t and spying on other characters?

As with the mirror trick, I’m not saying you should never do this, but if this solution is used too often your main character may come across as passive and weak, and you risk straining reader credulity.

So there you have it—common pitfalls to avoid when writing in first person! I hope this was helpful and that I haven’t scared you away from experimenting with my favorite point of view. There’s nothing better than a novel which introduces us to a new and standout voice, so get writing—I can’t wait to meet the characters you dream up.

Finola Austin, also known as the Secret Victorianist on her award-winning blog, is an England-born, Northern Ireland-raised, Brooklyn-based historical novelist and lover of the 19th century. Her first novel, Bronte’s Mistress, was published by Atria Books in 2020. Written in the first person, Bronte’s Mistress imagines the story of Lydia Robinson, the older, married woman rumored to have had an affair with the Bronte sisters’ brother. By day, Finola works in digital advertising. Find her online at www.finolaaustin.com.

The post Traps to Avoid when Writing in the First Person appeared first on DIY MFA.

Basic Cartography

The above is an example of what I call Traditional 4^th Person Perspective.  So, what exactly constitutes 4^th Person (The We without an I) and how does it function?  The basic premise of 4^th is that we are telling a story/novel/poem from a collective’s perspective.  This could be the voice of a corporate office (We here at BioTech believe we offer the best Robotic Children), a community (When we founded our commune, we hoped it would be a place of peace and brotherly/sisterly love), a niche social group (We were known as the Suburban Avengers and we wrestled every weekend in Don’s garage), or even a group of animals (At night we sniff at garbage cans and test out the lids with our claws). 

The key to the perspective is that the narrative voice encompasses a larger group and uses the narrative voice to speak collectively for them, avoiding ever using a central 1^st person “I.”

The Difference from 1^st Person Collective

A good way to understand how 4^th works is to examine its difference from 1^st Person Collective (wherein the “We” has a clearly defined first person narrator).  Here are a couple examples of what first person collective sounds like:

When our mother took us swimming, she’d sit on the beach drinking martinis from her Thermos while she watched us.  We sisters would swim beyond the crashing waves, and my older sisters would swim so far that I worried we’d never return.                

We’re the Rocket Launchers and our mission is to build rockets to the moon.  Donnie and Larry are twin brothers, and they get to come over as long as they bring gloves and winter coats.  Petey’s mom never seems to care where he is, so he brings the gasoline from her shed.  And I’m the one with access to gunpowder.  

While the use of “we” and “our” can be a prominent feature, beneath the voice of 1^st Person Collective is an “I” narrator that controls the tone/voice/language of the piece. Like all first person perspectives, the story/novel will be determined and limited to the attitude, age, experiences, and knowledge of the narrator. In this way the scope of the known world is limited. For example, in the rocket story, the narrator cannot omnisciently follow any of the children back to their homes or report on the dialogue that happens there unless the narrator literally follows them home or is later told this information (or is psychic!). 

4^th Person is inherently different because there is no limited “I.” Instead, in 4^th, the tone is influenced by the collective voice of the community/group but not hampered by it.  Here are some examples of what 4^th sounds like:

When the neighbors moved in, we wondered if they belonged in our community.  We think of ourselves as a welcoming community.  We bake pies, help one another paint our houses every couple years, and, mostly, have never uttered an unkind word about anyone.  But when we saw the neighbors arriving with their run-down car and their ugly children, we watched from our gardens and decided not to wave.

When the broomsticks appeared outside our bedroom windows, our hearts lifted like hot-air balloons.  The women tapped gently on our windows, and we crept from beneath the sheets, tiptoed carefully across the carpet so as not to wake our parents, and climbed across sills, reaching through the cold air to grasp the wooden handles.

In the first example, the creepiness of the community leaks into the very voice of the telling. In the second example, the awe of the children imbues the narrative voice.  In this way, 4^th has the option of being tonally colored by the collective voice of the group.  Most importantly, it will be this “we” that will tell the story of the community rather than any individualized “I” from within that group.

4^th’s Omniscient Range

And yet, 4^th doesn’t need to be limited by the voice of the community. One of the wonderful benefits to 4^th is that while the voice may be imbued by the community, it is not tied to any individual consciousness.  In the broomstick example above, though the children are young, the narrative voice and language doesn’t need to be limited to the linguistic limitations of the children.  For example:

We sailed above the land, and the houses below became faded postage stamps, obscured by the thin fingers of clouds and the frosts of the North which arrived early that year. Far below, in the chilled suburban dawn, men and women started their cars, clueless to the broomsticks which soared high above.

The language here is clearly beyond that of a child’s vocabulary, and yet this feels completely natural in 4^th person. 

Similarly, the known scope of the world can extend beyond the collective’s knowledge, becoming a more distant omniscient:

At home, our parents were waking up.  “Have you seen the kids?” our fathers asked, yawning in kitchens, their coffee mugs in hand. And they searched beneath beds, in closets, and finally, with panic in their voices, called police and firemen.

Like a mole digging tunnels beneath the ground, the omniscience of 4^th allows your narrative camera to pop up in any of the collective’s presence:

 At night we complained about the neighbors.  Tom, who owned the hardware store, would pour himself a tall glass of bourbon. “I don’t trust them,” he said to his wife.  “I know,” she said, and put down her knitting, then lowered her voice in case anyone was listening. “I think they’re dangerous.” Across town, The Woodstone’s were having their own private conversations.  “Maybe we should pay them a visit?” Mr. Woodstone said.

In fact, the voice is so omniscient, that unlike 1^st Person, it’s possible for the “we” to die in a story:

When we grew old, we closed our eyes, squeezed the hands of our loved ones, and soon we were buried.  And we gathered to say goodbye to those we’d lost, and gathered afterward to watch the young among us, the next generation, who we knew would one day bury us. 

In this way 4^th borrows the best attributes of interiority from 1^st with the best aspects of 3^rd omniscience. The combined range of intimacy and expansive omniscience is part of what makes 4^th such a wonderful perspective.

The Challenges of Dialogue & Movement

There are a few limitations to navigating 4^th smoothly. Movement and speech, for example, can become strangely cartoonish if we aren’t careful.

We decided to walk over and confront the neighbors.  “Open up!” we yelled.

In this scene the entire group is now congregating and yelling outside the house in a near-comic fashion. To solve this problem requires splitting the “We” into smaller groups:

A few of us decided to confront the neighbors.  Tom, his wife Rhonda, and The Woodstone’s were the first to go.  “We baked you cookies,” Rhonda said when the neighbors opened the door. “You mind if we come in,” Mr. Waterstone added quickly.

Another way to avoid the problem of strange collective moments such as: we went to the bathroom; we rode the escalator; or we honked our horn is to create a list of simultaneous actions:

We baked cookies, we offered to paint their house or to babysit their kids, we made small talk when we saw them at the hardware store, and late at night we called one another and told tales of what we’d seen. We plotted, we lamented, and finally, we gave up trying to be nice. 

Additional Variations

There are strange and wonderful variations within the new perspective.  In 4^th Person Address there is a “We” addressing a “You.” This is a particularly fun point of view that allows two of the black sheep of the literary family (4^th and 2^nd) to finally have the long-deserved page space they deserve.

Welcome to BioTech, we know you will enjoy your time here as part of The Future of America!  You will soon become one of our elite Robot Engineers, helping bridge the divide between human and machine.  We couldn’t be happier to have you with us!

There’s the rare and strange variation of 4^th Person Address that I call the Christmas-Card Perspective—wherein a couple is using the “we” voice without ever identifying themselves:

We are doing well, keeping busy here: Sarah is working on her teaching degree, and Bob is finally fixing the garage.

And there’s The Passive-Aggressive-Therapy Perspective:

 Sure, we’re a caring couple.  Though, admittedly, sometimes one of us forgets to clean their hair out of the shower drain and then the other one of us has to do that, even though that someone is already late for work.

How to Begin

If you’re interested in exploring our new perspective, it’s good to check out any of the stories below. Then consider how often we use 4^th Person in our daily lives (that sentence, by the way, was 4^th Person Address).  Think of all the boring company meetings and job trainings you’ve had to sit though, the way we talk about our families, our friend groups, our hometown, our favorite sports teams, our age group, our genders, class, race, or the tiny cliques we may be part of (We’re a post-pop, psychedelic-folk band).  Create an initial list of all the examples where you find “we” used.  Then choose one and explore a story/novel/essay/poem from this new perspective.

Resources from my work and others

 Two stories from my recent collection, Universal Love (Sanctuary & We Only Wanted Their Happiness) use the traditional 4^th Person Perspective.

My recent Tour Guide Series is all in 4^th Person Address

Steven Millhauser is a master of Traditional 4^th Person—check out his wonderful collection The Knife Thrower and Other Stories.

Amber Sparks collections The Unfinished World & And I Do Not Forgive You both have a number of variations on 4^th.

One of the most successful forms of The Passive-Aggressive Therapy Perspective is John Barth’s story “Waves,” by Amien Richard from his collection On With the Story.  

There are hundreds of other examples and new 4^th Person stories are emerging every year.  Feel free to add to the list, and send along your favorites to me at https://www.alexanderweinstein.com/

Alexander Weinstein is the author of the collections Universal Love and Children of the New World, which was chosen as a New York Times Notable Book of the Year, and a best book of the year by NPR, Google, and Electric Literature. His fiction and interviews have appeared in Rolling Stone, World Literature Today, Best American Science Fiction & Fantasy, and Best American Experimental Writing. He is the founder and director of The Martha’s Vineyard Institute of Creative Writing and a Professor of Creative Writing at Siena Heights University.

The post 4th Person Perspective: The We Without an I appeared first on DIY MFA.

Sharon is the author of the new novel Half, which has received accolades from places like Booklist, Publisher’s Weekly, Foreword Reviews, and the New York Journal of Books. She earned her a B.A. from Barnard College and an MFA in Creative Writing from Pacific University. She is also the author of the memoir Playing with Dynamite and she teaches at WriterHouse in Charlottesville, Virginia, where she lives with her family.

In this episode Sharon and I discuss:

• What it means to come of age and how her novel Half addresses that.
• Why it is important to assess what type of point of view to use for a project.
• How to use voice as a bridge between the writer and the reader.

Plus, her #1 tip for writers.

About Sharon Harrigan

Sharon Harrigan is the author of the new novel Half. She has a B.A. from Barnard College and an MFA in Creative Writing from Pacific University. She is also the author of the memoir Playing with Dynamite. She teaches at WriterHouse in Charlottesville, Virginia, where she lives with her family.

You can find Sharon on her website or follow her on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.

Check out Sharon’s essay, “Changing Me to We.”

Half

Growing up, identical twins Paula and Artis speak in one voice—until they can’t. After years apart, with lives, partners, and children of their own, they are reunited on the occasion of their father’s funeral. Seeking to repair the damage wrought upon their relationship by outside forces, the twins retrace their early lives to uncover what happened—but risk unraveling their carefully constructed cocoons.

Written in spare,lyrical prose, Half is an achingly beautiful story of intimacy and loss, revealing the complexity—and cost—of sharing your life entirely with someone else. Sharon Harrigan deftly explores how fierce love can also be the very thing that leads to heartbreak and betrayal.

Suggested Reading on the We Voice

Weightless: A Novel by Sarah Bannan

The Fates Will Find Their Way by Hannah Pittard

The Virgin Suicides by Jeffrey Eugenides

The Buddha in the Attic by Julie Otsuka

Ordinary Girls by Jaquira Diaz

We the Animals by Justin Torres

A Reunion of Ghosts by Judith Claire Mitchell

And Then We Came to an End by Joshua Ferris

The Committee on Town Happiness by Alan Michael Parker

If you decide to check out the books mentioned in this post, we hope you’ll do so via this Amazon affiliate link, where if you choose to purchase via the link DIY MFA gets a referral fee at no cost to you. As always, thank you for supporting DIY MFA!

Link to Episode 344

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If you liked this episode…

Head over to iTunes, Stitcher Radio, Spotify, or Google and subscribe so you’ll be first to know when new episodes are available.

Also, remember that sharing is caring so if you know anyone who might enjoy this podcast, please tell them about it or leave us a review so other listeners will want to check it out.

Until next week, keep writing and keep being awesome!

The post Episode 344: A Deep Dive into Point of View – Interview with Sharon Harrigan appeared first on DIY MFA.

Brad is a novelist, journalist, translator, and former relief worker currently quarantined in rural Peru. His novel To Remain Nameless was a Paris Review staff pick, an SPD recommended new fiction title, has been a small press bestseller since its release. It was named by Dennis Cooper as a Best Book of 2020.

Brad’s stories, essays, and articles have appeared in The New Yorker, Guernica, and the Whitney Biennial and some of his upcoming work will be featured in “From the Deep,” a major exhibition at the Smithsonian Museum of African Art in 2021.

Brad Fox left the US in the late 1990s and began working as a feature writer and television producer in the former Yugoslavia. Since that time, he has worked in various countries around the globe, doing different forms of humanitarian and arts-related work.

In March earlier this year, he left New York for what was meant to be a twelve-day trip to northeastern Peru, with the goal of studying with a traditional medicine practitioner and completing a book on the bathysphere dives — the first eyewitness account of the deep ocean. That twelve-day trip has extended much longer than those original twelve days, and he’s been doing virtual book launch events from a little table on the edge of the jungle, surrounded by monkeys, hummingbirds and poisonous ants.

In this episode Brad and I discuss:

• How his partner’s experiences as a doula inspired many of the characters and the structure of his book To Remain Nameless.
• What voice and POV techniques Brad used to transition between past and present to give his language “energy”.
• Why “writing for no reason” and experimenting in the moment is a large part of Brad’s writing process.

Plus, their #1 tip for writers.

About the Author

Brad Fox is a novelist, journalist, translator, and former relief worker currently quarantined in rural Peru. His novel To Remain Nameless (Rescue Press, 2020) was a Paris Review staff pick, an SPD recommended new fiction title, has been a small press bestseller since its release. It was named by Dennis Cooper as a best book of 2020. His stories, essays, and articles have appeared in The New Yorker, Guernica, and the Whitney Biennial. Upcoming work will be featured in “From the Deep,” a major exhibition at the Smithsonian Museum of African Art in 2021.

Brad left the US in the late 1990s and began working as a feature writer and television producer in the former Yugoslavia. He then began working with refugee populations as a relief contractor, an often brutal education in human nature. In 2004, Brad co-founded Neither/Nor, an illegal space featuring immigrant artists in Berlin. He was working with asylum seekers in Istanbul before he returned to New York in 2011. Since March 2020, Brad has been in northeastern Peru, studying with a traditional medicine practitioner and completing a book on the bathysphere dives — the first eyewitness account of the deep ocean. 

To Remain Nameless

Tess keeps vigil at the bedside of her friend Laura through a long night of labor as Laura’s first child arrives. The two have known each other for what seems like forever. Their humanitarian aid work has taken them from the Balkans, to Egypt, to Istanbul amid the ongoing refugee crisis—an era that includes the US’s war in Iraq, the Arab Spring, and many forms of global consequence and aftermath. Brad Fox’s first novel is a luminous inquiry into the incarnations and limits of hope. This writer helps us endure our questions about what forms care may take, what we may offer to anyone, near and far.

You can find out more about Brad on his website and follow him on Instagram and Twitter. 

If you decide to check out the book, we hope you’ll do so via this Amazon affiliate link, where if you choose to purchase via the link DIY MFA gets a referral fee at no cost to you. As always, thank you for supporting DIY MFA!

Link to Episode 337

(Right-click to download.)

If you liked this episode…

Head over to iTunes, Stitcher Radio or Google and subscribe so you’ll be first to know when new episodes are available.

Also, remember that sharing is caring so if you know anyone who might enjoy this podcast, please tell them about it or leave us a review so other listeners will want to check it out.

Until next week, keep writing and keep being awesome!

The post Episode 337: The Intersection of Voice and Point of View in Literary Fiction – Interview with Brad Fox appeared first on DIY MFA.

Today I have the pleasure of speaking with Melanie Moyer. Melanie is a debut author and veteran ghostwriter.

She graduated from the University of Pittsburgh where she studied Creative Writing, Religious Studies, Folklore, and Russian History. She regularly co-hosts a horror pop culture podcast called Splatter Chatter, serves as a co-host on the animation podcast Overly Animated, and regularly contributes pop culture pieces to Just About Write.

Melanie and I will be talking about her debut YA novel The Rules of Me, a fascinating novel with a unique point of view choice. Click below to listen.

In this episode Melanie and I discuss:

• The process of going from a short story drafted in college to a novel written years later.
• Point of view challenges that come with making the narrator be the main character’s imaginary friend.
• How this unconventional point of view choice ultimately enriches the narrative experience.
• The different pairs of characters that frame the story.
• The art and craft of world building and how to create rules for your characters.
• Navigating the workshop experience, with both its pros and cons.
• Writing for a YA audience and how to respect that reader’s point of view.

Plus, Melanie’s #1 tip for writers.

About Melanie Moyer

Melanie Moyer is a debut author and veteran ghostwriter. She graduated from the University of Pittsburgh where she studied Creative Writing, Religious Studies, Folklore, and Russian History. She regularly co-hosts a horror pop culture podcast called Splatter Chatter, serves as a co-host on the animation podcast Overly Animated, and regularly contributes pop culture pieces to Just About Write.

She has had work published by Ghost Parachute and is currently working on her next project, refining her pizzaiolo skills, and wondering if it’s too late to pursue her childhood dream of being an Egyptologist.

To connect with Melanie check out her website at melaniemoyer.squarespace.com. You an also follow her on Twitter and Instagram.

The Rules of Me

Gabe keeps lists: why he’s real, reasons he’s not, and the rules that seem to dictate his strange existence. Danny says he’s her imaginary friend and that’s always been enough for the pair of them.

But when she enters high school and a world of stress, turbulent emotions, and surprising first crushes, he finds himself asking questions and wanting things he never has before. His search for answers about where he comes from and why he’s here becomes critical as Danny faces a profound personal loss and they both begin to understand growing up means sacrifice and learning truths you never wanted to know.

If you decide to check out the book, we hope you’ll do so via this Amazon affiliate link, where if you choose to purchase via the link DIY MFA gets a referral fee at no cost to you. As always, thank you for supporting DIY MFA!

Link to Episode 223

(Right-click to download.)

If you liked this episode…

Head over to iTunes, Stitcher Radio or Google Play and subscribe so you’ll be first to know when new episodes are available.

Also, remember that sharing is caring so if you know anyone who might enjoy this podcast, please tell them about it or leave us a review so other listeners will want to check it out.

Until next week, keep writing and keep being awesome!

The post Episode 223: The Imaginary Friend as Narrator — Interview with Melanie Moyer appeared first on DIY MFA.

Today I have the pleasure of hosting novelist and screenwriter Augustus Rose on the show!

Augustus has a strong passion for numerous weird, esoteric, and fringe concepts, and found a way to thread them all together in his stunning debut novel, The Readymade Thief.

Listen in as we pick apart the many layers of Augustus’s strange yet relatable novel, and learn how weave together different points of view to create one compelling narrative.

In this episode Augustus and I discuss:

• How to transform high concept and strange ideas into a relatable story.
• Why starting with a prologue is necessary in certain situations.
• What narrative distance is, and how to manipulate it.
• When to break the “rules” intentionally so as to jar your in reader the right way.
• World building, and how to create a world based on different ideas instead of different landscapes.

Plus, Augustus’s #1 tip for writers.

About Augustus Rose

Augustus Rose is a novelist and screenwriter. He was born in the northern California coastal town of Bolinas, and grew up there and in San Francisco. He lives in Chicago with his wife and son, and teaches fiction writing at the University of Chicago. His debut novel, The Readymade Thief, is available now. To connect with Augustus check out his website at https://augustusrose.me/.

The Readymade Thief

Lee Cuddy is seventeen years old and on the run.

Betrayed by her family after taking the fall for a friend, Lee finds refuge in a cooperative of runaways holed up in an abandoned building they call the Crystal Castle. But the façade of the Castle conceals a far more sinister agenda, one hatched by a society of fanatical men set on decoding a series of powerful secrets hidden in plain sight. And they believe Lee holds the key to it all.

Aided by Tomi, a young hacker and artist with whom she has struck a wary alliance, Lee escapes into the unmapped corners of the city—empty aquariums, deserted motels, patrolled museums, and even the homes of vacationing families. But the deeper she goes underground, the more tightly she finds herself bound in the strange web she’s trying to elude. Desperate and out of options, Lee steps from the shadows to face who is after her—and why.

A novel of puzzles, conspiracies, secret societies, urban exploration, art history, and a singular, indomitable heroine, The Readymade Thief heralds the arrival of a spellbinding and original new talent in fiction.

If you decide to check out the book, we hope you’ll do so via this Amazon affiliate link, where if you choose to purchase DIY MFA makes a small commission at no cost to you. As always, thank you for supporting DIY MFA!

Link to Episode 168

(Right-click to download.)

If you liked this episode…

Head over to iTunes, Stitcher Radio or Google Play and subscribe so you’ll be first to know when new episodes are available.

Also, remember that sharing is caring so if you know anyone who might enjoy this podcast, please tell them about it or leave us a review so other listeners will want to check it out.

Until next week, keep writing and keep being awesome!

The post Episode 168: The Art of Narrative Distance — Interview with Augustus Rose appeared first on DIY MFA.

Today I have the pleasure of having bestselling author Jane Green on the show!  Jane has written 17 New York Times bestsellers, and her books have sold more than 10 million copies worldwide.

While her latest book The Sunshine Sisters might be pegged as a “beach read” there is a depth and a richness to the relationships between the characters that makes it so much more. Listen in as we discuss Jane’s latest novel and the craft of writing intricate character relationships.

In this episode Jane and I discuss:

• How to craft a story around a large issue, such as the right to die, without writing an issue driven book.
• How to craft characters with very different personalities all striving to find their “happiness” in a way readers will love, and the poem that inspired Jane to write about mother-daughter relationships.
• How to balance the tug-of-war between writing for the market and writing from your heart.
• Why you need to hear feedback, and how to know whether you need to listen to it.
• How using a unique POV framework can crystalize who the characters are, and keep things exciting for you as a writer.

Plus, Jane’s #1 tip for writers.

About Jane Green

A former journalist in the UK and a graduate of the International Culinary Center in New York, Jane Green has written many novels (including Jemima J, The Beach House, and, most recently, Falling), most of which have been New York Times bestsellers, and one cookbook, Good Taste. Her novels are published in more than twenty-five languages, and she has over ten million books in print worldwide. She lives in Westport, Connecticut, with her husband and a small army of children and animals.

To connect with Jane check out her website at www.janegreen.com.

The Sunshine Sisters

The Sunshine girls– Nell, Meredith, and Lizzy– are as different as three sisters can be. As daughters of Ronni Sunshine, former Hollywood starlet, they grew up in the shadow of their mother’s self-absorbed quest for fame. Each girl pursued happiness away from her mother and sisters.

But the selfish and manipulative Ronni has been diagnosed with a terminal illness… and wants her daughters back home to make amends before she takes her final bow. As the sisters face the loss of their mother, their relationships with each other start to heal, setting the stage for a final act in which, through making peace with their mother and each other, they will become the women they were truly meant to be.

If you decide to check out this fabulous book, we hope you’ll do so via this Amazon affiliate link, where if you choose to purchase DIY MFA makes a small commission at no cost to you. As always, thank you for supporting DIY MFA!

Link to Episode 159

(Right-click to download.)

If you liked this episode…

Head over to iTunes, Stitcher Radio or Google Play and subscribe so you’ll be first to know when new episodes are available.

Also, remember that sharing is caring so if you know anyone who might enjoy this podcast, please tell them about it or leave us a review so other listeners will want to check it out.

Until next week, keep writing and keep being awesome!

The post Episode 159: Character Relationships that Resonate — Interview with Jane Green appeared first on DIY MFA.

I’m so glad you’ve joined me for another episode of DIY MFA Radio. Today I have the pleasure of speaking with Delia Ephron, bestselling author and screenwriter. She’s the writer behind the novel and movie Hanging Up, as well as the screenwriter for movies like You’ve Got Mail, The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, and Michael.

She’s also a journalist and playwright, with her articles appearing in major markets like The New York Times, O: The Oprah Magazine, Vogue, and Vanity Fair, and her hit play Love, Loss, and What I Wore (co-written with Nora Ephron) running for more than two years off-Broadway and performed all over the world.

Her newest novel, Siracusa, is a haunting drama about two failing marriages and how the lives of these two couples (and one pre-teen girl) unravel on a trip to Italy.

In this episode Delia and I discuss:

• Keeping track of details when writing multiple points of view
• Getting into the heads of your characters and bringing that to the page.
• Knowing what details to share and what to withhold.
• Writing people who are real and complicated.
• Adapting stories versus creating new material.

Plus, Delia’s #1 tip for writers.

About SIRACUSA

Bestselling author Delia Ephron wields her keen understanding of the human psyche to mine the ruins of relationships in Siracusa, a thrilling emotional opus set in Italy and performed by a pitch-perfect choir of four voices.

New Yorkers Michael, a famous writer, and Lizzie, a journalist whose professional life is crumbling, travel in Italy with their friends from Maine – Finn, his wife Taylor and their daughter, Snow. “From the beginning,” says Taylor, “it was a conspiracy between Lizzie and Finn to be together.” Written Rashomon-style in alternating points of view, we see friendships and relationships bend and break as secrets are exposed and the couples careen toward Siracusa and disaster. “Couples collaborate,” says Lizzie, “hiding even from each other who is calling the shots and who is along from the ride.”

Snow–Taylor’s lookalike daughter–drawn into the adult drama, moves to the center of the story and is the catalyst for conflict between the women (Taylor a mother, Lizzie not) as well as a pawn between Finn and Michael. She is the mystery at the heart of Siracusa. Is she shy or she is cunning? Do we want to protect her or should we fear her?

Ephron’s masterful writing renders each adult character in stark detail–their inner monologue revealing darker truths about disappointments, envy and ambition. In a story that unfolds with the pacing of a psychological thriller, Ephron also delivers a powerful meditation on marriage, friendship, and the meaning of travel. As the vise tightens, Lizzie ponders: Is loyalty a more honorable pledge than love?

Pinging between multiple points of view and painting a detailed landscape of both the human heart and the Ionian seaside, Siracusa is an electrifying novel about marriage and deceit. As it spins to its shocking and unexpected end, Ephron effortlessly shape-shifts between personalities, offering insight from every character, infusing each chapter with equal parts wit and mystery, and leaving it up to the reader to untangle the truth from a wide net of lies.

You can get your copy of Siracusa via this Amazon affiliate link, which means DIY MFA receives a small commission at no cost to you. Thank you for supporting DIY MFA!

Delia Ephron is a bestselling author and screenwriter. She has written novels, including The Lion Is In and Hanging Up; humor books for all ages, including How to Eat Like a Child and Do I Have to Say Hello?; and nonfiction, most recently Sister Mother Husband Dog (etc.). Her films include You’ve Got Mail, The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, Hanging Up (based on her novel), and Michael.

Her journalism has appeared in The New York Times, O: The Oprah Magazine, Vogue, and Vanity Fair. Her hit play Love, Loss, and What I Wore (co-written with her sister, Nora Ephron) ran for more than two years off-Broadway and has been performed all over the world. She lives in New York City. To learn more, follow her on Facebook and Twitter, or visit her website.

Link to Episode 110

(Right-click to download.)

If you liked this episode…

Head over to iTunes, leave a review, and subscribe so you’ll be first to know when new episodes are available. Also, if you know anyone who might enjoy this podcast, please share!

Until next week, keep writing and keep being awesome.

The post Episode 110: The Unreliable Narrator and Multiple POV – Interview with Delia Ephron appeared first on DIY MFA.